I had decided that I was going to Jump. As I look out towards the Mississippi; I take in the beauty of my last, perpetual sunset. My breathe loosing control as I enter into a full blown panic attack. I have lost all hope all humanity; in my mind I am already dead. The traffic moving behind me on the bridge doesn't bother to notice me, or seem to care that I am on the outer railing of the bridge. I pause to slow down my breathing and gather up my courage. I suddenly notice a caterpillar on it's back just inches away from my feet. I suddenly can feel a smiling creeping up in my face. It is comforting to see another thing that is equal to me. I imagine that I am just like that pathetic caterpillar-a nuisance to the world. It has no real purpose. People despise it because of it's appearance. It will most likely die on it's back like that. I don't dare to turn it over because I know I wouldn't want to be.
" It'll be all over soon." I say half comforting it and half comforting me.
I turn forward again looking down to my death. It's time. I take in a deep breath and jump.
It all happen so fast like in the blink of a strobe light. As I started to fall I found my self not falling towards the river, but in an entirely different place.
In fact- I don't think all of science could explain what I was seeing right now- rays of every end of the rainbow spectrum were surrounding me; They are embracing me in fact. I am still falling at full speed, with colors- so many odd colors surrounding my head. Then as sudden as a rain drop; I stop in midair. I am now floating in what seemed like a bubble surrounding my little body. I gasp a mouthful of clean air as I see it. STARS- of every spectrum and color. I was in the mist of them in my little bubble. I, An outsider, gazing at their beauty from such a close....too close of a distance. Now water. With the colorful stars still within my vision-water filled the outer space. With in the safety of my bubble I begin to sink in this newly gathered water- completely different from the Mississippi. I sink and sink with the aliveness of what was occurring. Suddenly the bubble pops letting water rush all around me. I was sinking and could not longer hold my breath, but as soon as this happens the space that I was sinking in soon becomes the place where I float upwards to. That's when I see it, a hole ahead of me with light shinning out of it. I swim as fast as I can towards it. When I come closer to it I see trees. Then with all of the strength I have left I jolt upward. My head jerks back gasping in the freshly needed air. I look at my surroundings; I was in a tiny little pool of water with so many trees surrounding me. As I pull myself out of the water, I noticed the giant trees seemed to go on for what seems like forever. I also notice that there are several.....no hundreds of tiny little lakes like the one I emerged from. My mind is blown away; all of my rationality is no longer in existence. It is all so confusing. As soon as the thought strikes me, I see a butterfly. It is golden and so beautiful. It kisses the nape of my neck. Oh yeah, caterpillars become butterflies. I chuckle briefly for forgetting this, and turn my attention back to the butterfly that is now showing me around this strange place. I follow it, mezmorized. Then it finally comes to a stop, and rests on a certain lake and vanishes as quickly as it had come. There is still no rational thought left in my mind, so I just follow my instinct and jump into the water.
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